Thursday 5 May 2016

100 WC week 16

Getting my wisdom teeth pulled out has always been a fear of mine just the thought of all the needles and different tools frightened me. I was nervous until the doctor gave me my medicine, and I couldn't remember anything after that. When I woke up I felt nothing but after a little while suddenly the pain struck. Not more medicine meant I could feel everything. And that sure sucked.

5 comments:

  1. Your second to last sentence I think you meant 'no more medicine' instead if 'not more medicine'. Also, your last sentence starts with
    an 'and' , and you don't normally start your sentences with 'and'.

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  2. I kinda got lost near the end maybe you could clear that up

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  3. Your story was really good. But, the part where you say " when I woke up I felt nothing but after a little while..." You should have a comma after " woke up", and you should have a comma after "nothing." And later when you wrote "after a little while suddenly the pain struck." You should also have a comma after suddenly. Also, you should have a comma after "mine" in your first sentence which is "Getting my wisdom teeth pulled out has always been a fear of mine, (comma) just then..." But other than those things your story was really good.

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  4. I agree with Soccor lover. Also the last semtence you could add to it to make it more descriptive. You could add some descriptive language too, to really "set the scene"

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